After digging through a box of books I discovered in the attic, I found a book I thought I had lost during my last spring cleaning: School of Fear. I sat down and quickly read it and the other 2 books in its series. I soon remembered how much I loved SOF's slapstick comedy, sarcastic wit, and interesting characters. While the book is written for a middle-high school aged audience (and the writing isn't anything spectacular), it truly is a one-of-a-kind book that makes you accept absurdity as the norm and gives you a lot of laughs along the way. 90% of the book is stream-of-consciousness ramblings, but the author somehow managed to make it into ridiculous, funny scenarios.
I am not writing a review for this book, simply because I don't think anything I could jot down would do it justice. And I don't necessarily mean that in a good way...with SOF, it really is a love/hate relationship: the writing isn't the best, the plot is absurd, the characters are kooky, but you can't stop reading it.
Do I hate it?
Do I like it?
Still not sure.
Does it make me want to throw whatever it is I'm holding because I can't describe my feelings for it?
If I had to give one word to describe School of Fear, the word would be "entertaining." (There are many other words that come to mind, such as weird, random, bizarre, far-from-ordinary, funny, unique, strange, and eccentric. Then again, some of the best books out there possess some of the same characteristics. I would recommend reading the book so you know exactly what I'm talking about...it's better than me rambling on and on...)
Anyway, it is the most perplexing feeling I've ever had when reading a book.
In that spirit, we arrive at what this blog post is really about.
At the beginning of every chapter in School Of Fear, the author lists a "fear," i.e. a word with Latin origins whose definition begins with "the fear of..."
The four main characters are sent to attend the School of Fear to be put through many exercises/trials which would cure them of their fears (fear of water, insects, small spaces, and dying).
I wanted to list my all-time favorite (and ridiculous) fears from SOF, and I have done so below. Please enjoy these fears and their assorted comments.
Phobiophobia - the fear of phobias. This probably isn't the right article for you. But I was nice and put this ph*bia first so you could go ahead and stop reading. You're welcome.
Ablutophobia - the fear of washing or bathing. I met a kid like that once. He didn't smell too nice.
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia - the fear of long words. Now, if people with a fear of long words want to know what the name of their fear is, they're in for a bit of a surprise. Great job, whoever came up with that.
Peladophobia - the fear of bald people. They're scary. Well, everyone except The Rock.
Logizomechanophobia - the fear of computers. No comment.
Helminthophobia - the fear of being infested with worms. Please excuse me while I go throw up.
Arachibutyrophobia - the fear of PB&J sticking to the roof of one's mouth. Fear this.
Chirophobia - the fear of hands. Don't go to Universal Orlando, then.
Syngensophobia - the fear of relatives. I think everyone feels this once in their lives.
Erytophobia - the fear of blushing. How does this even work? Do you get scared of your own face?
Ephebiphobia - the fear of teenagers. HEY! PEOPLE WHO HAVE A FEAR OF TEENAGERS! Guess what? You were a teenager once.
Blennophobia - the fear of slime. Possibly the result of watching Ghostbusters and being terrified that you just wasted two hours of your life.
Gerontophobia - the fear of old people. HEY! PEOPLE WHO HAVE A FEAR OF OLD PEOPLE! Guess what? You're going to be old one day.
Neophobia - the fear of anything new. There goes your life.
Novercaphobia - the fear of stepmothers. You can blame Cinderella for that.
Opthalmophobia - the fear of being stared at. Don't ever wear a fandom shirt (see previous article).
Automatonophobia - the fear of wax statues. Seeing as I've been staring at this one for fifteen minutes and my brain hasn't come up with a sarcastic comment, I'll just leave it be.
Which one of the above is your favorite fear? Is there a funny one I should add to the list?
Comment your answer below or comment on my Twitter account, @HogwartsGrad_7.
After reading this, I know you really want to go check out School Of Fear.
Here's some info for you: author = Gitty Danshivari.
If you read it, let me know what you think of it!
Remember to never, EVER leave the house without your wand.
Being a successful, professional fangirl is by no means easy. There is actually a lot that goes into prepping yourself to become a real fangirl. Not to mention that there are an endless amount of fandoms that exist, and finding the select few that you really identify with can be quite a challenge.
Step 1: Familiarize yourself with the definitions:
1) "Sophisticated definition:" fan*girl - a female fan, especially one who is obsessive about comics, movies, music, or science fiction. (C)(Oxford Dictionaries).
2) "My definition:" fan*girl - a female fan, especially one who is prone to creating shrines to a specific movie, owning more fandom-related clothes than normal ones, finding every excuse to insert their fandom of choice into normal conversations, and crying profusely every time she reads her favorite character's death scene. (C)(Me).
Step 2: Choose a fandom:
Star Wars OR Star Trek? Harry Potter OR Game of Thrones? Lord of the Rings OR...well, there isn't really anything in the same league as Lord of the Rings.
How do you decide between all the fandoms? Here's how you can tell which fandom is best for you:
1. Start by exploring the stories you already like: if you own the extended versions of Lord of the Rings (ahem...guilty), then why not start there? If you're the first in line on opening night to see a new Star Wars movie, then, yeah, I'd say that would qualify you to claim that fandom.
2. If you find yourself freaking out whenever you see someone wearing a specific geeky, fangirl-y shirt, then make sure to keep track of which fandoms you do that to most.
3. If you've grown up reading a favorite book series, then it may be time to explore the side culture that goes along with that series. Are there enough places to buy t-shirts to satisfy every fangirl's inner need to express their fandom? (Psst...if you can get past the emo music and overall uncomfortable feel of Hot Topic, they actually have some pretty decent clothes). Do enough people like your fandom, or are you going to be the only one in your town who really gets it?
4. If you have feelings (i.e. crying, uncontrollable hysteria, wailing and gnashing of teeth) whenever a character in a book/movie you like dies, that sounds like a pretty good fandom to stick with. If you're that emotionally involved in a story, then that is hands down your fandom.
5. If you still can't decide which fandom you want to be involved in, ask a friend (specifically a geeky friend) for help. If you don't have a geeky friend, ask one of those people whose shirt you freaked out over. They'd be glad to help you.
Step 3: Acting the Part
Most fangirls generally devote their time to one specific fandom. There is a rare species of fangirl out there that has the brain capacity to properly fangirl over 2 or more fandoms (mine are Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter...go, brain capacity!). If you're not going to do it right, don't do it at all.
Once you've found your fandom, you need to become the fangirl you were born to be. This includes, and is not limited to: dressing in fandom clothes, associating with other fangirls, reading, discussing your fandom whenever possible, reading, annoying the heck out of your family by sending not-so-subtle hints about your fandom-related Christmas presents, reading, taping quotes from your fandom all over your bedroom until it looks like a printer threw up, begging strangers for money so you can visit the places where your fandom was filmed (UM, HELLO, NEW ZEALAND!), reading, etc. You get the point.
Step 4: Don't Let it Define You
Being a fangirl is fun, but if you find yourself forever thinking about your fandom and not able to concentrate on anything else important (school, job, life), then you should probably tone it down. If that means not wearing a fandom shirt for a few weeks, then go ahead and do it. Remember, kids: it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live. (< Yes, that is a Dumbledore quote). Keep in mind that fandoms are fictional, and those characters you love so much are, sadly, fake. Occupying your time with dreams of running away with your fandom's main character may be fun, but it won't help you better your life...unless you happen to write for Mugglenet.com.
The most important fangirl golden rule is: do NOT obsess. Nobody likes a person who only talks and thinks about fandoms. Honestly, I think even other fangirls get annoyed by each other sometimes. Be open to doing other things outside of the fangirl bubble.
I hope this guide has helped you to grasp a better understanding of how to be a professional fangirl! I enjoyed writing it, and I certainly hope you enjoyed reading it.
Don't forget to bookmark the page if you want to keep up with more blog posts, and to comment if you like a post.
Remember, never, EVER leave the house without your wand! :)
“All we have to decide
As you all know, I am a mega Lord of the Rings fan. There are many quotations from LOTR that I find particularly inspiring, and today I will share one of my favorites.
I realized, though it was later in my life, that the things I thought were important now wouldn’t even be remembered in a few years. I used to do Facebook and Snapchat, then I realized what’s the point? Taking pictures so everyone can see them? Basically bragging about what I have? Updating people on every little thing that happens in my life? Talk about invasion of privacy...and I was doing it to myself. In a few years, no one will even care that I went to the beach and snapped a photo with a pelican. Was I posting photos for my enjoyment, or to be liked?l
Everyone is so caught up with Snapchat, Instagram, social media in general, taking selfies, dressing “right,” that people are missing out on the important things in life. Instead of spending time on a smartphone, or locked away in your bedroom, do something meaningful.
Spend time with your family, go hiking, enjoy the outdoors, do all that without wanting to take a photo for Instagram, and just be happy to live in the moment. If you open your eyes and observe the little things in life, you’ll eventually get the big picture: do everything for the glory of God, and not to glorify yourself or impress others.
Decide what to do with the time that is given to you...will you have spent your time on Earth wisely?
”Why, sometimes I believe as many as
This week’s quote is from the book my blog is named after: Alice in Wonderland.
AIW has been one of my favorite books since I was a little girl, simply because of its whimsical, unbelievable, and impossible characteristics. It’s the story of a young girl’s journey through a fantastical land, full of magical creatures and characters.
I chose this quote because sometimes believing in the impossible (or in the context of the quote, “unbelievable”) can open new doors to pursing a certain dream or quest.
That, and it’s just a really fun quote. 😄
I used to think my goal of becoming a writer for a newspaper was impossible, but I pursued my dream and I now write for a local newsletter. Sure, it’s not a big, fancy newspaper, but that’s my next impossible thought...
Keep checking back for the next quote of the week (or “quote-whenever-I-feel-like-it”).
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